Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Retirement Blues

Getting old is a pain in the neck and not having to work has made it worse. It's my own damn fault.  I should have been more realistic when I made plans. My wife of 54 years is the brightest shining light I've ever known. I have no wish to do anything she has a good reason to object to. No, I'm not getting off the subject. This is important to understand because she objects to many things.  I know every one. I have known for years that she is timid and is not keen on new adventures. When I actually pulled the plug, closed my little business, and began talking to her about the future . . . I had my eyes opened quickly.

I suppose we should plan to live at least 10 more years. It seems prudent at the moment. I had developed a short list of things I would really like to do. I wanted to sell our house, move to a small apartment in a slower moving and less frantic community. There's no way she will (or should) leave her job with her brother Jim. I've accepted that. I wanted to buy a small motorcycle run-about. I'd take no freeways or long trips.  I was astonished and surprised that she was so totally against anything that had two wheels.  I took a brief
stab at it anyway but she never relented. I gave up. . . . and have regretted it ever since.  My bucket list is surprisingly short. And I still don't understand her objection. 

From long experience I've learned that she is never going to be a thrill seeker. Also, if I am going to do something a bit off-the-wall, she is going to object. Knowing those things I have to revise my retirement ideas.  If I want to jump out of an airplane like 80 year old President Bush, it won't hurt her . . . so I may just go ahead and do it.

We have a successful and equal partnership.  She gets what she wants, when and how she wants it. She has a nice little retirement house, in a neighborhood she knows and likes, she is near good medical care, near close family members, and near where she wants to work. She has a nice car, decent clothes, and her health is excellent.

It is her choice that: She doesn't travel, take cruises, boats, busses, trains, or airplanes. There is no place she yearns to visit, not Canada, Europe, Meditereanean, Eastern United States, National Parks. She really doesn't want to go anywhere that is cold or has snow on the ground, or has a damp climate.  She seems to have no interest in Broadway Shows, or places where she has to stand in long lines, or museums,  art galleries,  chair lifts,  narrow trails, and no place farther than a hour from a rest room.

It is a  challenge to find something that she would like to do. I'm a little frustrated but apparently it can't be helped.


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